I have decided to let this day end early, as it has been an emotionally weird day for me, and not a day which I care to prolong, for that reason alone. Is there something in the air which is causing me to be overly emotional about ridiculous things, or is it a signal of final morning for those thoughts and things which brought the sadness into my day? I would love to say that this is the turning point in my period of mourning for those things I feel I have lost, and that I am finally moving on and allowing myself to forget those hurts and forge ahead past lost or failed relationships - and the failed non-relationships, but the fucked up truth is I know that would be a lie. I can't lie to myself with conviction though, so there is no point in trying.
The day started out well, with me contemplating writing a short story about 'a first kiss'. Not one which I have received, but the next one I want to receive. I had coffee and watched the news for a while, before prepping for a teleconference with some folks from my favorite company, regarding the job for which I am being considered. I don't know why, or how, but somehow, after the conference call, my spirits sank, and contemplating writing a story of a first kiss me sad. The rest of the day was an emotional land mine, and I am well pleased to put it behind me. Oh, yeah. I am still going to write about a first kiss, but I am going to write it when kisses which I will never receive again have not created such a sense of sadness within me.
Mom, Dad, Derek, Aliyah, Devon, Leeta, Kathy, Robert, Junie, Charles.
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